Okay its February.. wooohhh..It’s a love month. hihihi.. *kilig*. Yes guys I am happy, but this entry of mine will not be talking about romantic love. It is already common for every blog to post about their lovelife, about their plan for the coming love day, and about their love story. I’ll be posting a love that is usually taken for granted. Okay you maybe asking, was there a love that is taking for granted? And you will say there is no such thing like love that is taking for granted unless you don’t love them. Well to tell you the truth there is. It is unconditional love actually that we sometimes forgot to appreciate. This is part one of my entry.

The first unconditional love that we haven’t appreciated most is God’s love. See I told you; you have taken forgranted HIM right? When was the last time you have thanked HIM for all the blessings that HE has given to you? Have you ever remember HIM during those showers of blessings days? Or have you just remember HIM when you feel alone, your sad, your lonely, your depressed, in short your down. Much worst is you blame HIM for all the hardships you have encountered not remembering that there were so many things you have to thank from HIM. Have you ever pray and say thank you to HIM during the times that you have a blissful career, a perfect love with your partner, stable family, peaceful heart and mind? Or have you only pray for HIM during the time that you have wishes, you have desires you want to achieve, you have problems that you need to solve? Or well worst is you haven’t ask or seek for HIS help during your alone days and you thought of hurting yourself cause you feel so alone that no one was there to help you, or to understand you. Okay I know somebody may raise his or her eyebrows, who are you talking and why are you talking like that. You are not perfect and you also have your shortcomings and I bet there are times that you haven’t thank him. I will not be a hypocrite, yes there are times that I forgot to thank him but not forget to pray when I’m down. Hahaha. Bad Bhelle, don’t I? Yes it is true and I’ll be honest about it, that is why I am writing this to my blog because I have realized and reflected after having in such a down feeling I have gone through but see with HIM being there to listen to all my bitterness, I am now happy for HE granted my prayer. :D I am still good *and cute* girl daw. Hehehe. So have you also forgotten HIM? If you think that you can’t wish for anything because you are blessed enough and you haven’t thank HIM I hope that this entry will make you reflect that all beautiful things you are experiencing right now is one of HIS beautiful plan for you. If you think that your down, that there’s no one available to listen to your sentiments, that you are afraid of being rejected by other people, that you feel alone, I hope that this entry help you realized that there is a GUY up there ready and waiting for you to say all your sentiments in life. That HE is much willing to take care of your dilemmas and willing to carry you while you are experiencing hardships in life. It will not lessen you as a person but it will lessen your agony and pain knowing that there will be somebody you can tell your aches.

Ito ang isa sa patunay nam agaling ang Pinoy. Mga Linyang tumatatak sa isipan kahit na tapos na ang palabas.

Estelle: "You're in love with somebody else, and that somebody else is not worth it, Rafael."

Rafael: "Mas kaya kitang mahalin."

Katherine: "Kaya kong saktan ang sarili ko, pero hindi kita kayang saktan."

Katherine: "Nagkakamali ka. Hindi na ako marunong magmahal ngayon. Patay na ang puso ko, Rafael."

Isadora: "Ang ganda-ganda mo na ngayon Katherine, sarap mong patayin!"

Isadora: Kung gaano ka katayod lumipad, ganun ka rin kabilis lalagapak. Ouch!

Katherine : Senior vice president ako ng kompanyang ito, ako ang legal wife ng may-ari ng kompanyang ito, tauhan lang kita, at higit sa lahat, madrasta mo ako! Kaya layuan mo ako. Get out of my sight! Leave! Now!"

Scarlet: Look who's here, my favorite step-mother. Ang dating gold digger in red, isa na ngayong merry widow in black."

Scarlet: 'Ha! Kung sa bagay mas bagay sayo yang itim, kakulay ng budhi mo!''

Katherine : Bakit ka nga ba nakaputi? Para pagtakpan ang mas maitim mong budhi

Scarlet: Ikaw ba, totoong nagdadalamhati ka? Kasi napansin ko, kaya mong mag-biro. Kaya lang ang corny mo! Anyway, gusto ko lang malaman mo na lahat nang 'to, hindi 'to permanente. Lahat nang iyan, babawiin ko iyan sa 'yo!"

Katherine: Sige! Maglaro tayo, agawan ng yaman! Pero kung ako sa'yo, kakabahan ako, kasi ako sanay sa hirap. Eh ikaw?" –

Isadora : Gusto mo ikaw ang itali ko? Pasweet sweet ka pa diyan, ganid ka rin pala!"

Katherine: Ang bigat naman ng salitang 'yon Isadora, pero totoo, oo ganid ako! At gusto ko, ni singko walang matira sa'yo! Kaya manginig ka na Isadora, dahil uubusin ko ang lupang tinatapakan mo!"

Katherine: Iba na ang sitwasyon ngayon Isadora. Marami akong pera, kaya ko nang bilhin ang kahit na ano. Kahit ikaw, magkano ka ba?

Isadora :Hayop ka! Kahit kelan hindi mo ako mabibili, at hindi mo ako kayang bilhin!"

Katherine: Sabagay, ayoko sayo. Mumurahin ka eh, pero yung anak mo ibebenta mo ha. Sige na, promise hindi ako tatawad. Kahit used goods na, ok lang. Pag-isipan mo.

Katherine: Pagod ako. Huwag kang loloko-loko. Baka gusto mo ihampas ko tong bag kong mas mahal pa sa'yo!

Isadora:Sabagay, ako rin eh, pagod makipaghampasan. Next time, ok? In fairness ah, ang ganda ng damit mo. Pahiram minsan ha.

Katherine: Natatakot ka ba sa akin, o sa sarili mo? Alam mo, bibigay ka rin."

"Sana, dumating ang panahon, na akong nagiisang laman ng puso't isip ni Miguel. Sana ako lang ang mahalin niya."

Scarlet: Pero hindi ako susuko, kahit anong mangyari, babawiin kita Miguel. Dahil alam kong naging una kang naging akin. Dahil alam kong hindi kita kayang kalimutan." - Katherine

Katherine :Pakisabi sa bisita mo, ayoko ng nangangamoy basura ang bahay ko."

Katherine: Anak ka nga talaga ni Isadora, nakuha mo lahat sa kanya. Mata-pobre, mayabang, at higit sa lahat, bastos!

Sophia : Don't you dare say bad things about my mother, kumpara sa 'yo. anghel ang ina ko!"

Katherine Anghel na may sungay!

Sophia: Oo, may sungay. Para suwagin ka! Para mauna ka na sa impyerno!

Katherine :Hmm. Matagal-tagal na kayong inaantay dun. In fact, balita ko, si satanas mismo ang sasalubong sa inyong mag-ina!"

Lola Aura :Panandaliang donya, habang buhay na busabos.

Scarlet : Mamamatay tao ka! You killed my father!”

Katherine: Kung may gusto kong patayin, ikaw yun Scarlet!

Rafael :Alam kong hindi mo sinasadya pero ang sakit sakit ng ginagawa mo Katherine. Hanggang kailan ako masasaktan... Hanggang kailan?

Jester :Paano mo malalamang in love ka na? Yung hindi attracted lang…

Scarlet :Luluhod ka sa harapan ko at magmamakaawa ka na tanggapin kita ulit!

Miguel :Kumain ka na. Gutom lang yan!

Isadora : Oh aren't you excited to see me?

Scarlett: Excited? Alam mo bang mas excited pa akong magpunta ng dentista at mag pa root canal kesa ang makaharap ka?

Isadora : Ikaw naman, nagpapaka-funny. Kung ang lahat ng bulok na ngipin ay kasing ganda ko, o di wala ng bibili ng toothpaste… I'm so witty

“Ano ba talagang pakay mo? I'm sure hindi naman ang kapakanan ng dental industry ang pinunta mo dito di ba? Business? Monkey business?

Isadora : Oo, at napaka disenteng monkey business. Politics.

Isadora : Ba't mo ko sinampal, biyanan mo ko!

Scarlet: Di lahat ng biyanan, pinagbibigyan, Di lahat ng biyanan pinapatulan! para yan sa mga biyenang bakulaw tulad mo!

Scarlet: Tapos ka na sa gold digger in red. Tapos ka na rin sa merry widow in black. Ngayon, baka pwede ka ng dirty mistress in dirty brown.

Katherine: Same to you anak, remember? Pareho na tayong nasasadlak ngayon.

Scarlet: Damn you, damn me. Karma's a bitch, and so are we…

Miguel: Lagi mo sinasabing karma’s a bitch. Look what happened… Na out-karma ka na, na out-bitch ka pa.

Isadora: Pesensya na, perfect ako…nagkakamali din

Isadora: Di pwedeng mawala sa akin ang Hacienda Amadesto. Di pwedeng mapunta yun kay Aura. Anong gagawin nya dun? Home for the aged?

Scarlet: Tapos na tayo sa agawan ng yaman! Next level na! Agawan ng mapapangasawa!

Scarlet: ano na bang role mo ngayon? tapos ka na sa pagiging gold digger in red..married widow in black, baka pwede ka ngaung dirty mistress in dirty brown?

Yung iba bukas ko na ipopost. Nakakapagod magtype habang nanonood.

Labels: Show Off

It’s been quite awhile since I have decided to keep my silence. I have stop thinking with what went wrong or what have I done. It will just drown me to depression. I have concentrated myself on you and it’s difficult for me to accept the fact that things are not working out the way we wanted them to be. I do not know what really your reason is; all I know is that I will understand whatever it is. Maybe its really time that made us apart. Were both busy with our careers, we both have our dreams, and we both want to fly. Who am I to stand your way?

I have nothing to say against you. You’re such a perfect gentleman. You took care of me well, you treat me like a queen, you have loved me the way I have never experience before. Your patience was long enough for my tantrums. Your advices make my sight view clearer. You put out the best in me, made me realize that I can to do things I am afraid of. You made me realize that every relationship is unique and that ours has its own unique way to be cherished. You opened my eyes in what real relationship has and I have learned a lot from it.

I am now fine and have accepted the truth. I do not know what my life would be without you for I have seen my forever with you, but I have to stand strong. Little by little pain will vanished and I know time will come, I will thank that I have face this pain. A bittersweet memory that will mold a new me and that will make me stronger person.

I may not be the girlfriend you wish you have, all I know is that I love you and always will, though that is not enough.

P.S. I love You.

Labels: Personal

Something Abstract that would symbolize Philippines.

Labels: Show Off

Labels: Personal

Last November 8, Jared and I had our date. It’s not the ordinary date we used to do. It’s special since it is our 1^st anniversary. First we watched Quantum of Solace, it’s a bit cold inside the movie house, so Jared gave me his jacket and hug me. Weeee. Sweet *kilig*. After that, we head to Café Ysabel. I am touch how Jared took care of me while heading there. I have ordered Char grilled Prawns *it’s a 3 pieces prawn with pasta at the center. Looks yummy * while Jared had steak *I can’t comment about the stake haven’t tasted it*. Then I had my dessert Peter Pan Pie *ice cream with cotton candy hehehe* and Jared had his cup of coffee. It’s nice to be there at Café Ysabel. Had a great time there and it’s a bit romantic because there’s someone playing piano. As we went home, we haven’t talk that much action speaks louder than words.

I have just thought while writing this entry, it is not how long you have been together. It is the quality of relationship you have.You may be in a relationship for a period of time but what is its worth if the two of you were not made for each other if your not happy with it? What would be years of being together worth if someone or both of you cheats? What would its worth if your not together he/she is looking, pleasing, and wanting somebody else?

Well at least, I know to myself that my Jared is loyal, and that he makes me happy with all his heart. In return, there is no man I would love like this but him.

Labels: Personal

Last November 3 my relationship with my boyfriend turn 1 year old. It is really hard being in a relationship. Our relationship had a fair share of trials that made us almost give-up. We have our differences and at times we had conflict. Many have thought that were a perfect couple, that our love were made in heaven. In reality were just like any other couple, we have fights (mostly I got angry to little things), we have differences, and we have our issues we need to talk about. Trials came before we celebrate our first year anniversary. I have cried and pray that we may settle things. It may sound too dramatic but its true. I really love this person. He is such a beautiful person inside and out. Despite my bad traits, he accepted me for who I am and for what I am. He makes me feel beautiful, even at my worst. I am just simply comfortable with him, I can tell everything to him. It may be issues with me, in my work, with my friends, with my blog, with the forums I am member with, and he is there ready to listen and well he is just there to listen, if I have conflict with somebody he just say that he is not in the position to comment. He does not know both sides of the story and he just want me to be careful to every action that I will make. He is such an intelligent person, sometimes I love it and sometimes I don’t. I love it when I ask questions, he can easily think of answers that most of the time satisfies me *and I believe him lolz*. I hate it when we have an argument *well, joke argument, often times when we tease each other* he knows how to argue, and often times I shut up and think of counter attack but I can’t think of any. He had transformed me to become a better person. Not only on judging things but also as me.

One thing that I am proud of him is that he is very honest person. Even if he haven’t texted me and I found out thru his text that he went home late *concluded that he went for a gimmick* I know that he is faithful to me. He is one-woman man and never involve to any cheating issues. There are so many guys out there and most of them were polygamous in nature and here I am, very lucky to find one monogamous guy. He has gained respect and trust from me and in return I have my peace of mind. For I know that I am the only lady he love.

I know that Jared is not perfect; he has his own shortcomings just like a normal person would have. Still, I am thanking the guy up there for giving him to me. If ever were not made for each other, I will still thank him for he has given me a treasure that I have to keep. A man that is rare to be found.

Labels: Personal

Why

by: Bhelle

Why do I have to fall for you
When you're not there to catch me
Why do I have to wait for you
When I know you're time isn't mine
Why do I have to long for you
When you're longing for somebody else
Why do I have to feel the pain and cry
When you're not there to wipe my tears

I may be crazy
I may be a fool
All I know is my whole world is you
I know that someday, somehow
It's gonna start all over again
It could be you, It could be another
Just when you have realized
That I was meant for you ..

Labels: Poem

Kanina habang papasok ako ng office, inde ko alam kung ano ang reason pero mainit ang ulo ko. Siguro kasi tatlong oras pa lang ang tulog ko dahil hindi ako pinatulog ng sipon ko.. hmmp, at ngayong ok na ako, natatawa ako pag naaalala ko yung ginawa ko.

Habang nilalakad ko yung street namin, yung tricycle hinarangan yung dadaanan ko. Sabi sa akin nung driver,

Driver: “tricycle?”.

Dati winawasiwas ko lang nag kamay ko para sabihin na inde ako sasakay, dahil mainit ang ulo ko, winarla ko si manong driver.

Ako: “Manong kung sasakay ako, inde na po ninyo kailangan iharang ang tricycle ninyo kasi sasakay ako kaso hindi naman ako sasakay pwede po bang pakialis sa daanan ang tricycle ninyo?”..

Tatawa-tawa si Manong. At hindi ako natutuwa, lagi na lang silang ganun, hinaharang yung pasahero para macorner. Akala naman nila sasakay sa kanila e paano kung iba ang ruta nung pasahero nila. Hmmp..

Naglalakad ako, biglang umulan, badtrip na ulan ito inde muna ako pinasakay bago bumuhos, tinatamad akong ilabas ang paying ko hahaha..

Sumakay ako ng tricycle sa may kabilang kanto *iba yung dadaanan ni Manong kanina at nung sinakyan ko ngayon*, siningil ako ng 16 pesos. Dati tahimik lang ako kasi piso lang naman pero kanina pinatulan ko.

Ako: “Manong kulang po ng piso ang sukli mo”

Manong: “Diba special trip ka? Dalawa bayad nun. 8 + 8 =16”

Ako: “Manong nakalagay sa taripa pag special trip 15 lang po. Araw-araw ako sumasakay dito at araw-araw akong special trip. 15 lang nag kinukuha sa akin gusto ninyo balik tayo sa pilahan ninyo at magtanong tayo?” *Malakas loob ko kasi kilala ako ng mga driver doon at alam nila na 15 lang talaga ang pamasahe ko*

Manong: “Siya ito na ang 1 mo. Parang 1 lang nakikipagtalo ka pa."

Ako: “E paano namimihasa na po kayo na 16 ang kinukuha.”

Nung nasa may sakayan na ako ng Bicutan-Alabang, siksikan yung dyip. Yung nakasakay ko kasi e luluwas na atang probinsiya at inunahan na ang Undas. May mga dala silang damit, biskwit, tubig at kung anu-ano pa. Yung katabi kongm anong nakikipagkwentuhan sa akin.

Manong: “”Ang sikip ano? Yung nasa unahan kasi natin uuwi ng probinsiya.”

Ako: “Oo nga po e”

Ako ay tumahimik na at humanda na sa pagtulog dahil gawain ko ang matulog sa dyip pag pa-Alabang na, kaso maramdaman ko yung braso ni Manong nasa gilid ko. Simpleng diskarte. Inde ko muna pinansin. Nung nagbreak yung dyip, bigla kasi huminto yung braso ni Manong nasa boobs ko na. Sige inde ko pa din pinansin kasi baka dahil nagbreak lang ng malakas yung dyip. Aba, nasa SLEX na kami inde pa din inaalis ang braso niya, lecheng manong ang aga-aga e. Nung hindi ako makatiis, kinuha ko ang kamay niya at sinabi ko:

Ako:manong yung braso ho ninyo, nangangapit-bahay, dito niyo po ilagay sa bag ninyo mas malayo naman ako kesa sa bag niyo diba?

Manong: *behave at sleep mode*

Nakababa na ako, yung katapat ko sa dyip na pa-Alabang e nakasakay ko din papuntang ATC. Isa siyang saleslady.Sabi niya sa akin:

Saleslady: Miss buti na lang sinopla mo yung lalaki kanina. Maniac yun e. Dati hinipo nun yung hita ko. *since naka miniskirt ang mga saleslady prone talaga sila sa ganun*

Ako: Ganun po ba?

Saleslady: “Oo. Kaya nga tinitignan kita kanina. Saka inde lang yan yung Maniac, meron pang isa yung may bigote na nangingindat. Bigla ka aakbayan nun.”

Ako: “Ay kilala ko na po yun, nakasakay ko na po yun at kinindatan na din ako dati. Kaya nga inde ako pumapasok na ng late kasi ayoko ng makasakay yun.”

Hay naku ano bang araw ito .. hahaha

Labels: Life

It has been quite a while since the last time I have post about what is happening to me.

I am really busy these past few months and can’t find time to compose something substantial about my life today.

What had happened to me these past few months?

1. My manager and my senior resigned last May and June. I have to study the flow of the system I am assigned to since there is no other programmer that will handle this system beside my boss, me and our newly hired employee that is subject for training. I really had the hard time coping with the pending jobs left on us. Imagine there are four people working for this system and almost all of them where seniors and here it is in my front doing them with only two of us. A junior that is striving to be a senior programmer *left no choice* and a newly hired programmer that is in need of training. Thanks God after 5 months, we have cope up and wheeew.. pending request has been one by one eliminated. From 26 pending we have face now were a bit free-up to study other part of the system were handling at. At least what I have learned is that, I learn new things and I can handle those things I thought I can't do. All I need is a little push for me to realize that hey, I am really a programmer and can handle things in my craft.
2. After the five months pure work that I have been doing, my health suffered. I had an allergy, fever, cough and cold last October 23 plus LBM last October 21. I had to use my sick leave and still sick until now. At least I can think and work properly now. Still having a cough and colds but at least it is better than last week. Had to blame the weather though.
   
3. As I have been sick, my dad and my mom were also sick. I couldn’t stand seeing them sick too. I got a bit depressed seeing them sick and can’t do anything to take care of them since I was sick too. There's no one left to take care of them *sob*
4. My relationship went on the rocks. I thought it wll end up. *Thanks it haven't ended so soon our anniversary is near :(* All relationship has their different problems and different situation. I have learned that I should not compare what we have and what we don’t have, because if I kept on comparing my relationship to others, I will not learn to embrace my relationship. At least we have fixed and talk about it and I am very much happy looking forward for our First year Anniversary. I am still thinking if I will treat him a dinner or an out of town treat. Well he let me promise to just treat him for a dinner and yet change his mind when I said I am also planning for the out of town surprise, after we have watch a movie. Well honey, I still can’t decide. :p And still don't know where to treat you :( I'm running out of time.

There were so many obstacles that I have been thru these past months and here I am still standing and laughing to those trials in my life. I must admit that I have been depressed and cried because I thought that I could not balance my life again but with the help of the almighty above, my friends, and family, with those advises that have given me and enlighten me on what decision to do with those trials, I had overcome them.

After the storm, there is a bright sky waiting for us. A rainbow that will appear to let us know that we have succeeded in life’s challenging trial.

Everybody has their own life’s obstacles and it should not be a reason for us to give up. Sometimes there were painful stages in our life that we thought we can’t do anything and we just stay in one corner and cry and that depression hit us. I just want you to know guys that every dilemma in our life can be fixed. We may not know why we are experiencing them right now, but just think that answers will be revealed after those trials. We should not think of giving up our lives and be controlled by depression. Life is beautiful and it’s a gift. It is on how you manage to stand up after the storm.

Labels: Life